The only thing I knew about it before the day we arrived was that it was in the movie Close Encounters.
Through the National Junior Ranger program and working with my boys on their badge I learned what it is to those who considered this a sacred ground and didn't have to "own" land, when there was never a consideration of buying and selling land. Amazing how this country is owned and came to be owned. What lessons here in so many ways.
The history is rich as is the lore.
I felt a palpable air of tension and a lower vibration - I couldn't decipher but there was a clear disturbance in the "force". I chalked it off to it being the alien connection. Dax who is empathic was troubled when we came close. He was adamant from the moment he saw it that he must climb it. But I said we would hike as far up as we could but wouldn't scale it. He became very troubled and I gave it to mean that he was tired and hungry and out of sorts because we were nomads for a bit.
The day and even the hour and the moment we visited was deeply sad and tragic. I believe this is what Dax was picking up on throughout the time we were there as he gravitated in a way I had not understood until later. But there is a bigger lesson in all of this for me and I do not want to forget these details.
When we arrived we were in awe but not in the way of the beauty of Yellowstone. There was something off - weird, strange around and of the location. We'd just driven from Yellowstone and Devils Tower was our mid way stop before camping near Mount Rushmore.
It is June 2017.
We went through the Junior Ranger programs with the boys and they were sworn in and received their badges. While this was happening a rescuer came in to the center and was getting assistance for the search and rescue team. We found out a climber had fallen. When we entered we were told it was closed for the hawk breeding season and then we were told it was a voluntary closure for summer solstice for spiritual reasons of the Native Americans - both of these were in effect for the month of June. Dax pushed through and wanted to get up the mountain. I stayed back further and took photos of the prayers cloths. When I finally caught up with Dax he was watching the rescuers bring down a gurney. I thought that must be a good thing because they found the person not even for a moment thinking they had died. I felt dazed and confused. Shattered. I continued to think it must be that we are tired and hungry. When Dax saw the men and then the bag on the gurney he asked - is he dead? He can't be. That's not a body. Dax asked point blank to the rescuer and finally he answered - yes. It should have been obvious but the form was not straight. I won't describe it here. In that moment I felt a whoosh of confusion and communication. There was such intense confusion that was not my own, I felt my desire to protect my son from an image I would not wish on him and yet show our respect and reverence.
We said prayers on the mountain. I knelt down and cried. Dax was frustrated and confused. But put a hand on my back and I shared my sadness for the man and his loved ones. I tried to stay on the mountain and away from anything with the rescuers and the ambulance. We took our time getting down but the ambulance was there and still waiting when we got down ourselves. I felt followed, not following.
I tapped with the boys EFT - chanted a blessing for the dead to safely journey home. There were many others people tourists, big tourist bus but I don't know where they went. Because I was driving and the only car I could see and then the ambulance right in front of us as we left the mountain in our car. The next thing I knew was this whoosh of emotional communication came in fast the understanding of the body really being done (dead was not the word) and then this intense communication from - a male energy, clearly a man although I would have had no idea. But this young man was the energy, clean, nice, not mean, just confused said "my family, oh no I didn't mean for that to happen" confusion on where his body was, I only oriented him and let him know that that body was no longer useful and that he had some choices of picking up a new baby body but that he did not need to stay with that body any longer. He was free. He saw or felt what I felt - meaning I felt his orientation from my senses and I felt a shift in the beings energy - an understanding. Then a simple but light fearful how do I tell the people I love I'm sorry, I love them - I said I would. Tell my love I am sorry, tell my family, I am sorry, I love you. I didn't mean for this to happen. Some other things were said but it is not necessary to repeat them here. But I want this written for Dax - so Dax you can read this and we can talk about it later.
Once this happened. I said he's free. Dax asked for an explanation and then it was a huge shift - all of a sudden there were prairie dogs everywhere and Dax was a little boy wanting to see the prairie dogs and be out with them.
I will continue to process this and clear Dax and maybe Ryder - but he says he knows what happened.
I am sorry MS that you lost your body. It sucks. Infinite love and gratitude. Peace and blessings and Chi. God Speed.
Mama lesson to self - Stephana - you don't and are not responsible for everyone and everything. There is no reason or meaning as to why you and the boys were there at that time in that moment. Does there really have to be? Is there a higher force? IS there a CREATOR? YES. Rest assured. But there was no plan this was not law of attraction. IT's ALL good - if you can learn from this. What did you learn? TRUST. I must trust myself. YES but more so you must stop assuming everything and making excuses for what is going on in yourself and in others - most especially your sons as they are the most important to you. But you cannot keep making meaning out of everything. You must relax. BE PRESENT. What have you been preaching? Piloting your way? Well use it - do it. practice presence. and stop judging everything. You must observe without the judgement and you will gain more than just the "answers" which you think is a consoling point. It is not, it is not going. Don't you see yet? You cannot control everything. You cannot. Control is such a wrong word - humans use this word - English - to control release what you pounded in so forcefully with all the dharma from a sci fi book. RELAX. Your answers are you. BE BE BE. Breathe. It's all OK. Death is an illusion. Understand everyone is fitting in their beliefs. Do not try to fit into their beliefs to be you - you will not find your bliss.
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